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Routes To My Blog

When I started this blog, I imagined that the most interesting element of its upkeep would be the comments I received. Not so. Have a click around; they are tedious and puerile and I hate you for writing them.
Instead, what has really captured my fascination has been the wide range of phrases people have googled in order to arrive at my page. WordPress provides me with a summary of what search terms have been entered to get here, and I have made a modest hobby of collecting them in a jar. Now, for the first time, here they all are; dead and desiccated, pinned in neat rows to a cork board and taxonomically separated for your perusal.

For the record, it doesn’t say which search engine they come from. I have run a few through Google that haven’t come up in the first few pages, but who knows how far along the ‘o’s these people are prepared to click. Further than me, it would seem.

BIZARRE

warning I can kill you with my mind

g20 kettle wetting pants

funny skeleton pictures

happy trolls

lady gaga on the soup

mexican nerd

tragic nerd

fat paki with glasses

pete doherty pig

john west littledick

the man who died of elephant poo

squalor mum: ‘i want my kids back’

it wisnae me mousemat

lady gaga penis

سكس جروب    (I don’t remember where I wrote that, but it translates to ‘group sex’ apparently

cold porcelain models

sex cereal

luxury cunt

piss on breakfast

SEXUAL

oral sex & cheese

cold dildo

my boyfriend wanking to facebook

Male ass to mouth

urostomy bag porn

wordpress search- big cock

genital bleaching

teach me how to hurt my balls

why are their facebook skanks in underwear

chastity tight st. louis

sexy guests wearing black boots on jeremy kyle

shoving the hitachi wand in my pussy

horse scrotum

“little black dress” “butt plug”

sluts in plymouth

UNSETTLING

be nice to animals or ill kill you

he wants to kill you slowly so you suffer

defloration gash

Child dildo

kill you and hurt

how to hurt someone slowly but painfully

i will kill you nickola!!!!!!

child abuse needs to because you can killed the and they end up the streets make that one sentences

join me as a rape group

any punishments for kids tampons

child to fuck

PARANOID PARENTS

i will kill anyone if my child is taken

If someone hurts my child I will kill them

mothers hurting children

teacher hurt my child

hurting child mentality in school

will it be weird if I don’t send my child to sunday school every sunday

why does direct light hurt my childs eys

why do random strangers kill children and why do they get away with it

thinking your baby will kill you

if you hurt one of my family i will kill your whole family

women peedafiles

peadofile dressed up as clown in leeds

JUST SAD

my child thinks slowly

why has god hurt my child

child killed at london fair

I don’t know what is more unsettling about the above; that people are searching for these things or that their quest sends them here…

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. Eric permalink
    August 9, 2009 12:17 am

    reminds me of that old sport of googlewhacking!

  2. August 23, 2009 1:55 pm

    You made these up

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